Several years ago, I recorded a podcast episode about family meetings and called it Adventures in Family Meetings. At the time, my sons were 13 and 16. Fast forward to now—they’re 21 and 23—and we still have family meetings. Not with the same frequency, and the format has evolved, but the intention remains the same: to foster connection, collaboration, and care within our family.

This is the story of how family meetings became part of our rhythm—and how they’ve grown with us over time. Whether you live with a partner, a full household, or are part of any kind of chosen family, I think you’ll find something useful here. And who knows, you might even start a new tradition of your own.

Why Family Meetings?

We often assume we can “figure it out as we go,” but in my work as a coach and wellness practitioner, I’ve seen how powerful intentional conversations can be. We evolve faster and more sustainably when we do it together. That’s true in the workplace, in wellness programs, and yes—right at home.

Family meetings, or household check-ins, are a simple yet powerful way to:

• Strengthen communication
  
  
• Resolve conflicts with care
  
  
• Coordinate logistics more smoothly
  
  
• Reflect on what matters
  
  
• Support one another’s projects and dreams
  
  

They’re not just about getting organized; they’re about evolving—together.

The Origins: From Classroom to Kitchen Table

I first learned about group meetings when I was a first-grade teacher. In my classroom, we held weekly class meetings where students could share what was going well, discuss issues on the playground, and offer appreciations. The experience was so positive that when I later became a parent, I brought the same idea into my home.

In the early days, family meetings were mostly about sibling conflict resolution and yes, a lot of conversations about Legos. Later, as my kids became teenagers, meetings evolved to include schedule planning, support for each other’s projects, and household responsibilities.

Buy-In Matters: Waffles and What’s In It for Me

Let’s be honest: not everyone was on board right away. My husband Steve was skeptical, and the kids thought it sounded… well, dumb. That’s where the magic of buy-in came in.

I used a little coaching acronym: WIIFM – What’s In It For Me?

When my kids were younger, the answer was waffles. I’d make a big breakfast as a warm-up to our meeting. Later, the incentive became coordinating car use, getting rides, or aligning on weekend plans. For Steve, it was getting help with yard projects or syncing calendars for social events.

Everyone had something they wanted—so we made family meetings the place to make it happen.

Building Our Family Values

Over time, we created a shared list of family values—our North Star for how we relate to one another. We co-created this list (not top-down!) and revisited it often. Even now, years later, it still holds up:

• Speak with honesty and kindness (we call this “care and candor”).
  
  
• Respect one another’s words and actions.
  
  
• Support one another in projects and learning.
  
  
• Contribute to shared spaces with a strong work ethic.
  
  
• Have fun together.
  
  

This value-based approach turned our meetings into something more than a to-do list. They became a space for connection and mutual respect.

Anatomy of a Family Meeting

Here’s a basic structure that’s worked for us—adapt as needed!

1. Set a regular time.
We used to meet weekly on Sunday mornings. Now it’s more occasional, usually when everyone is around.

2. Keep it short and sweet.
Aim for 20–30 minutes max. Everyone appreciates a focused, upbeat meeting.

3. Start with a positive focus.
Each person shares something going well—an appreciation, a win, or just something they’re excited about. It sets the tone.

4. Review schedules.
Talk through the week ahead: rides, appointments, meal plans, who’s home when.

5. Share project updates.
What’s each person working on? Who needs support? What’s happening around the house or yard?

6. Address concerns.
Is something not working? Use this time for respectful problem-solving.

7. Plan for fun.
Talk about outings, trips, concerts—whatever brings joy.

8. Close with gratitude.
Say thanks. Celebrate that you came together. Then go do something fun.

For Evolving Families, Always

Family meetings aren’t just for young kids. They evolve with your household. These days, we meet less often but still rely on this structure for major coordination and connection.

And even if you don’t live with others, you can try a version of this with yourself—a weekly check-in, a reflection ritual, or a goals session.

At its heart, this practice is about connection and evolution. Whether you live with a partner, your kids, housemates, or even just with yourself, setting aside time to reflect, plan, and connect makes a huge difference in how we live and relate.

So here’s to adventures in family meetings—take two, take ten, take your own.

And if you give this a try, I’d love to hear how it goes.

With care,Annie